The Three Loves

They say we experience three loves in our life: the first love, the hard love, and the true love. The first one happens when we're young. When we grow up, it may not seem like it actually was love, but the truth was, it was love in the way we knew love to be at a young age. The second one, the hard love, is the one which teaches us the most. We realize what we love about love and what we don't. This love includes pain and arguments, drama, and damage. But from this love, we grow the most. The last one, the true love, is supposed to come up when you least expect it. It comes to you. No matter how hard you try to avoid it, this love will find its way to your heart. 

You were the first. When I lost you, I lost my best friend. Looking back now, our lives would have been completely different if we hadn't ended. You taught me how great it is to have someone by your side no matter what. But the thing is, you may not even be the first. I'm not sure if there was love or if it was just "deep like". But at the time, it was love. I wish we were still friends. 

You were the second. The pain the came with losing you was unbearable. I just don't understand why. We had made promises only to break them a few months later. At first, I did not think you were this love. I thought you were the last. But if you were, I'd still be with you right now. I have learned so much about myself, about relationships, about life just from being with you. I learned how deeply I could love another person. I learned what it meant to be so serious about someone that you actively put their happiness first. I learned what it was like to consider another person when making decisions. I learned what it was to trust someone with everything. And for that, I thank you. This is the love that will never leave me because it taught me the most important lessons about love. This love forced me to grow up.

You are the last. I'm not expecting you any time soon. Honestly, at this moment, I'm not expecting you to come at all. Yet, something in me knows that you will come when I least expect it. And I know, when you find me, I will know without a doubt that you are this love. There are going to be and have been many people in between each of these loves. You may also confuse people to be one of these loves. I thought I had already gone through my three, found the last one, only to realize after we ended that he could be the first or the second. He may not even be one at all. But I trust that each of these people was in my life for a reason. And I can only hope that one day I will look back and not see pain, but see growth within myself.